The beginning…

Here goes nothing…I always recount Forest Gump’s mother telling him that life is like a box of chocolates. I always loved that movie, but dared to differ there. Life in many ways is like a penis: Easy, hard, sticky, smelly, pleasant, itchy, uncomfortable but liveable. Side note on that- a penis is not weed and ergo not something to be smelled before it’s seen #keepitclean.

Being black and gay has certainly flung its fair share of penises in my direction. I hail from a small town and have chosen to reside in mahogany closet. Being black didn’t help things in process of growing up. My version of black tax is different. My experience with it was in form of awkward silences when a family member was forcing me to felate them…I am sure someone had an idea. It is amusing that the perpetrator of this perceivably enjoyable ‘violence’ asks me to this day when he will meet my wife. I remember muttering under my breath once that it would be soon if she had a dick like his.

Thankfully, Dad had a job that enabled me to experience the finer things in life. Snobbery became me and it enabled me to hide or avoid the reality of being drawn to ‘life’.  Boarding school was rough and there were no allowances for effeminate behaviour. It was sad to watch my ‘cohorts’ being shamed back into their glass closets. Shame kept me from doing anything- as well as my formerly thin frame.

Enough of dwelling in the past. I have done away with shame. I am not the quintessential gay in any count. It’s in my sights to regale you with my life experiences. These range from someone telling me it wouldn’t hurt at all, to discovering what whiskey dick is- and trust me, a half mast is worse than limp noodle.

I had been told that a blog should be between 750 and 1000 words ideally, but hey, the ideal penis should be about 7 inches and on too. So forgive me if I derive pleasure from things that fall short. Forgive me , again,  for my perceivable fixation on penis. I am a ‘top’ by all counts. A friend once pointed out that I would not be gay at all if penis was not a front runner in my mind.

I must sign off for now. There is someone in my bed. They came to town looking for a job and has not left since. You tell me…Till the next chapter… Wakanda Wakanda kuita sei. Mxm! Tsvakai varume apo. Chando chakaoma ichi!